~worthiness is your birthright~



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Girls are like apples on trees.

The best ones are at the top of the tree.

The boys don’t want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt.

Instead, they just get sour apples from the grounds that aren’t as good, but easy.

So the apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they’re amazing.

They just have to wait for the right boys to come along, the one who’s brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree.

08:43 pm, by shesthedifferencemaker132 notes

Women are the gatekeepers of sex for a simple reason. The “cost” of a sexual encounter is much higher for women than for men.

There is the risk of being impregnated, possibly even by a bad or unworthy man. Women are far more likely to contract STDs than men are. And of course women are more likely to invest emotionally in a sexual encounter, even a casual one. (Note: It’s true that pregnancy can now be prevented or terminated, but our brains haven’t changed in thousands of years.)

The most important thing a woman can do in mating is manage these risks. She does this by filtering men based on cues that signal an intent to stick around after sex. By delaying sex long enough to assess a man’s intent, character, and reproductive quality she eliminates poor prospects and considers only men with the potential to be good fathers.

10:01 am, by shesthedifferencemaker21 notes

knowledgeequalsblackpower:



I was researching Mormons and slavery when I came across the amazing Bridget “Biddy” Mason.
Biddy was born a slave in 1818 (sources say in Mississippi or Georgia), yet she would die in Los Angeles in 1891, free from slavery and one of the richest women in Southern California.
At age 18, she was given to the Smiths as a wedding gift.

…in 1848, with a wagon train’s “Roll ‘em out!,” Biddy’s master, Robert Smith, moved his family from Mississippi to the new Mormon “City of the Saints” by the Great Salt Lake. All day, every day, Biddy walked behind her master’s covered wagons in the dust and mud made by wagon wheels and hooves, keeping watch on his animals. When the wagons stopped at night, she cooked meals over the campfire, washed clothes in the river and nursed anyone who was sick.

With one of her children on her back, she walked the entire trek which took about 7 months. 
Two and a half years after they reached Utah Territory, Mr. Smith was sent to help the new Mormon settlement in San Bernardino. They arrived in California in 1851.
Mr. Smith soon learned that California was a free state. He didn’t tell this to his 14 slaves, but Biddy saw other black people working for themselves. She talked to them, and she discovered something in California that was better than gold. She discovered she could be free.
Biddy had been a slave her entire life. She couldn’t read or write, she didn’t have a penny in her pocket, and she had three daughters to care for. But Biddy wanted to be free. She wanted her daughters to be free.
Mr. Smith wanted them to be slaves, his slaves.
So, in December 1855, he began a move to the slave state of Texas. Biddy did not want to go. 

One of her friends, black businessman, Robert Owens, alerted the local sheriff to the presence of slaves, and the sheriff placed Smith’s slaves in jail for protection.

Then Biddy talked to Judge Benjamin Hayes in his office at the Los Angeles County Courthouse. (She wasn’t allowed to speak in the courtroom because she was black. [SOME “FREE” STATE, HUH?]) In January 1856, Judge Hayes ruled that Biddy, her daughters and all Mr. Smith’s slaves were “free forever … to work for themselves in peace and without fear.”
Biddy was free. Now she needed a last name, a place to live and a job. She took the name “Mason,” perhaps from one of the Mormon trailblazers.

Biddy and her daughters stayed with Owens and his family and began working as a nurse.

Dr. Griffin paid Biddy Mason $2.50 a day, and she saved every penny. She dreamed of owning something a slave could never own — land. By 1866, Biddy had saved $250. She bought a piece of land with vineyards and willow trees out in the country, on 3rd and Spring streets.
Biddy had two little houses built on her property to rent. She kept saving her money and she bought more property. By the 1880s, people were flooding into Los Angeles. They needed land. Biddy’s land became very valuable, and she sold some of it.
Soon Biddy Mason was rich. She could buy anything she wanted. And what she wanted was something that gave her great joy — she wanted to help others.
She continued to doctor people, but now she did it free. She paid for things churches needed but couldn’t afford. She visited prisoners in the county jail, took them food and prayed with them. She was one of the founders of the First AME Church of Los Angeles. She taught other women how to be nurses and midwives. She started a school and day-care center for children, bought groceries for people in need and took those who were homeless into her home.

(via LA Times, California Social Work Hall of Distinction)



*mind is officially blown*
This is what I should have been learning in history class :)

knowledgeequalsblackpower:

I was researching Mormons and slavery when I came across the amazing Bridget “Biddy” Mason.

Biddy was born a slave in 1818 (sources say in Mississippi or Georgia), yet she would die in Los Angeles in 1891, free from slavery and one of the richest women in Southern California.

At age 18, she was given to the Smiths as a wedding gift.

…in 1848, with a wagon train’s “Roll ‘em out!,” Biddy’s master, Robert Smith, moved his family from Mississippi to the new Mormon “City of the Saints” by the Great Salt Lake. All day, every day, Biddy walked behind her master’s covered wagons in the dust and mud made by wagon wheels and hooves, keeping watch on his animals. When the wagons stopped at night, she cooked meals over the campfire, washed clothes in the river and nursed anyone who was sick.
With one of her children on her back, she walked the entire trek which took about 7 months.

Two and a half years after they reached Utah Territory, Mr. Smith was sent to help the new Mormon settlement in San Bernardino. They arrived in California in 1851.

Mr. Smith soon learned that California was a free state. He didn’t tell this to his 14 slaves, but Biddy saw other black people working for themselves. She talked to them, and she discovered something in California that was better than gold. She discovered she could be free.

Biddy had been a slave her entire life. She couldn’t read or write, she didn’t have a penny in her pocket, and she had three daughters to care for. But Biddy wanted to be free. She wanted her daughters to be free.

Mr. Smith wanted them to be slaves, his slaves.

So, in December 1855, he began a move to the slave state of Texas. Biddy did not want to go. 

One of her friends, black businessman, Robert Owens, alerted the local sheriff to the presence of slaves, and the sheriff placed Smith’s slaves in jail for protection.

Then Biddy talked to Judge Benjamin Hayes in his office at the Los Angeles County Courthouse. (She wasn’t allowed to speak in the courtroom because she was black. [SOME “FREE” STATE, HUH?]) In January 1856, Judge Hayes ruled that Biddy, her daughters and all Mr. Smith’s slaves were “free forever … to work for themselves in peace and without fear.”

Biddy was free. Now she needed a last name, a place to live and a job. She took the name “Mason,” perhaps from one of the Mormon trailblazers.

Biddy and her daughters stayed with Owens and his family and began working as a nurse.

Dr. Griffin paid Biddy Mason $2.50 a day, and she saved every penny. She dreamed of owning something a slave could never own — land. By 1866, Biddy had saved $250. She bought a piece of land with vineyards and willow trees out in the country, on 3rd and Spring streets.

Biddy had two little houses built on her property to rent. She kept saving her money and she bought more property. By the 1880s, people were flooding into Los Angeles. They needed land. Biddy’s land became very valuable, and she sold some of it.

Soon Biddy Mason was rich. She could buy anything she wanted. And what she wanted was something that gave her great joy — she wanted to help others.

She continued to doctor people, but now she did it free. She paid for things churches needed but couldn’t afford. She visited prisoners in the county jail, took them food and prayed with them. She was one of the founders of the First AME Church of Los Angeles. She taught other women how to be nurses and midwives. She started a school and day-care center for children, bought groceries for people in need and took those who were homeless into her home.


(via LA Times, California Social Work Hall of Distinction)

*mind is officially blown*

This is what I should have been learning in history class :)

01:53 pm, reblogged from knowledge equals black power by shesthedifferencemaker2,822 notes

I encourage black women to forge NEW strategic alliances. I am not saying “you are all alone and on your own. Deal.” No I am not.

I am saying to many sistas: Create strategic power alliances OUTSIDE of black constructs and dismantle ingrained distrust of other races.
BW Blow the Trumpet

(Source: twitter.com)


03:05 pm, by shesthedifferencemaker13 notes

Being biologically-related to someone does not mean that person doesn’t have to meet your standards in order to have a relationship with you.

Living with high standards is a serious commitment that takes enforcement. You will have to drop some folks - yes, even relatives.

image

(Source: twitter.com)

05:45 am, by shesthedifferencemaker26 notes

The choice of a mate is the single most important decision a woman makes in her life, especially if there are to be children. If she chooses wisely, she will reap many rewards, but if she chooses poorly, she has paved the way for herself and her offspring to suffer, for generations!

06:56 pm, by shesthedifferencemaker16 notes

It’s okay to make getting married and having children a priority.

Some of us are content with our careers, but some of us do want to focus on meeting the right guy, getting married, and having a baby or two.

For some reason, that has become taboo to admit. 

If you dare say it aloud, you are somehow “limiting women” or “regressing all that women have fought for”.

Does anyone else feel like that’s the vibe out there sometimes?

Regardless, I’ve stopped feeling pressured by it. I am a woman on my own terms.  No one can define it for you except for you.  And as ONE woman, I’m starting to think I would get more satisfaction out of life being a mother and wife than I would working in corporate America.

08:39 pm, by shesthedifferencemaker10 notes

Being friends with benefits is going to keep many of you single. Have a standard. Have boundaries. Have requirements that you LIVE.

1 lady told me: I cook, I clean, I’m his shoulder to cry on, & I lend him $$$…I asked how long ya’ll been married?…She said we’re not.

08:01 am, by shesthedifferencemaker9 notes

petitoignon replied to your post: femmeblackchick replied to your post:…

birth controlllllllllllllllllll but seriously my best friend and I were having a conversation about black women and our general lack of using BC.

The kicker is that MOST black women are not behaving this way. The stats don’t say over 70% of bw are having kids out of wedlock  It says over 70% of black American children are born out of wedlock.

The problem is these women don’t stop after 1 …or even 2. The same women are having multiple kids in homes that are not stable whether through rape (often these black girls are not even 18) or it’s by their own accord.

But no one wants to talk about it :(

let’s not even talk about the excuses people give for not having a damn condom around.

08:11 am, by shesthedifferencemaker2 notes

femmeblackchick replied to your post: femmeblackchick replied to your post: “I raised 6…

There is nothing wrong with having high standards and I will never lower them. This is why so many black women have kids out of wedlock because our standards are far too low. However I’m not apologising for calling them stupid.

07:54 am, by shesthedifferencemaker6 notes

femmeblackchick replied to your post: “I raised 6 kids on my own and I did it all without a man!”

Omg these women are so stupid, 6 kids?! That’s crazy! I know women who have kids and everyone of those kids have a different father. SMH

HOW DARE YOU CALL THEM STUPID!! what an ELITIST COMMENT!!!

WHY are your standards SO HIGH?!?! LOWER THEM IMMEDIATELY!!

…no but seriously. It’s gotten wayyy out of hand.

07:33 am, by shesthedifferencemaker2 notes

SINGLE PARENT HOMES

What are your thoughts?

Are kids from these households at a disadvantage?

Why are the numbers so high among black Americans??

Would you marry a man who didn’t grow up with a father?!?!

It’s a HOT topic today after President Obama CLAIMED he grew up in a single-household…..when we know his white grandparents raised him as well as his step-father.

What are your opinions on what Mitt Romney said about having children after marriage?

SPEAK YOUR MIND TUMBLR!!!

07:05 am, by shesthedifferencemaker3 notes

Black Women….

answer me this:

What has the Obama Administration done SPECIFICALLY FOR YOU or for BLACK AMERICANS, that pushes you to elect him for a second term???

I’m curious.

I’m looking at these embarrassingly high unemployment numbers for black Americans and I just don’t get it.

I’m going over how many issues that affect our lives have been ignored these past 4 years and I don’t get it.

Two women get appointed to the Supreme Court….any of them black women?? And yet we voted for him in HUGE numbers. I don’t get it.

I’m looking at how black women like Shirley Sherrod, Susan Rice, and other bw have been thrown under the bus to protect his image and I don’t get it.

someone (kindly:) explain this blind loyalty to the President.

I hope BW know that it is okay to be selfish. Other groups are selfish lol. They get what they need for their groups and don’t apologize for it.  White women, Jews, white gays, etc. The majority of black Americans still don’t get it and it shows…

08:48 pm, by shesthedifferencemaker18 notes

I won’t be satisfied with either candidates answer on the gender pay gap.

That is a conversation I feel many are not ready to have in this country. 

06:44 pm, by shesthedifferencemaker

"Don’t make the mistake of linking femininity with weakness."

10:37 am, by shesthedifferencemaker2 notes